EPHESIANS 4:25 – 5:2
WE BUILD EACH OTHER UP, BY GRACE.
In the name + of Jesus.
These verses from Ephesians could be summed up rather simply. You can take them to mean, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39); or you could even take it one step higher and quote Jesus who said, “Just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” (John 13:34) Jesus wants the perfect, selfless love he has for us to be demonstrated among each other too. “For we are members of one another.” (Ephesians 4:25) We are to be reconciled to each other. We are to strive for each other's good. We are to build each other up, by grace.
If there is one phrase in here that sounds bizarre, it is this one: “Be angry and do not sin.” (Ephesians 4:26) The fact is that we are all sinners. Given enough time, we will prove it by sinning against one another. We each have our own agendas, and we get absorbed in them. As a result, we either belittle or ignore the needs and concerns of others. It puts a strain on relationships—colleagues, family, and fellow members of the church. And when you are sinned against, you will become angry.
Our Lord knows what it is to be angry. As much as we think of Jesus as a friend of sinners and as one who loved even the outcasts, he had more personality than a plush toy. Jesus grew angry. When the priests had allowed the temple to be turned into a stockyard, Jesus angrily drove out the money changers and sellers of animals. After frequent attempts to call the Pharisees to repent of their self-righteousness, Jesus finally devoted Matthew chapter 23 to stern judgment against them. Even Jesus' apostles did not escape his anger. When mothers were bringing their toddlers to Jesus, the disciples shooed them away, as if to say, “No, no. Jesus is too important to be bothered by them.” But Jesus became indignant with them. He rebuked his disciples and summoned the children to come to him. Jesus grew angry over sinful assumptions, stubborn pride, and selfish ambitions, but he did not sin in his anger. Zeal for God's house, God's truth, and God's mercy consumed him. Jesus' anger was directed at anyone who stood in the way of these things being given to others.
You and I, however, do not have such pure motives in our anger. When we we feel the sting of someone's sin against us, we are not motivated by love for the one who has sinned against us. We do not want reconciliation, but revenge. We tell others how we were wronged. Whether our story is accurate or enhanced, we enlist friends to despise the person who wronged us—thereby wronging that person. Rather than reconcile, we divide. Rather than build up, we destroy. Our anger usually turns to sin. It brings harm to others, and often to ourselves as well. And it gives the devil an opportunity to lead us into even greater sins. Repent.
Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil. (Ephesians 4:26-27) St. Paul reminds us that sins which are left to fester will not go away or get better. They are like a tick on your leg. It is a problem that must be dealt with and removed, because once it burrows in, it does greater damage. Husbands and wives probably know this better than anyone. When they have a disagreement about something, they may try to pretend it does not matter. They ignore their issues and their feelings. But the anger and resentment build until they are having an all-out shouting match about where the toothpaste gets squeezed or which way the toilet paper should hang on the roll. Finally, neither can breathe right without the other finding fault. Their sins against God and each other continue to mount. And while they may want to be reconciled, they would much rather be right. It happens similarly in friendships and in congregations.
Holding on to grudges may make you feel superior, but grudges do not cure anything. Grudges keep the wound open. Worse, grudges destroy. They give an opportunity to the devil to seize us. They grieve the Holy Spirit. A sinful spirit and the Holy Spirit cannot dwell together in the same heart. If we allow our sins to fester, take root, and harden us, the Holy Spirit will finally have to depart—for it means that we love our anger and our sin more than we love our neighbor and more than the Lord who calls us to forgive, to seek the good of others, and to build each other up. Sin that is not dealt with destroys much more than friendships and marriages; it destroys faith. Repent.
Dear Christian friends, we are all sinners, but we are also all joined together into one body. Jesus did not join us to his body because we are justified in our anger. On the contrary, Jesus has every right to be angry with us for our sinful self-importance. Jesus could tear us down for exalting ourselves, and he would be right to do so. But rather than execute his righteous judgment, Jesus seeks our reconciliation. Rather then destroy us, Jesus seeks to build us up. Jesus came into this world with an agenda—to save sinners. Jesus made you his top priority. Jesus saved you from God's righteous anger. He humbled himself to exalt you. He was destroyed to save you. Jesus took the cup of God's wrath and consumed every last drop. Jesus prayed over the agony in Gethsemane, and was consumed by this agony at Golgotha. But even as Jesus suffered in innocence and was punished for sins he did not commit, he did not sin. He did not get angry that he had to endure this for you. He does not get angry that you now because you continue to need forgiveness from him. Jesus' love for you is constant. He does not hold a grudge, and he does not seek revenge. He forgives all your sins. He reconciles you to the Father. He seeks your highest good.
Jesus has brought you into his Church, which is his body. And he has joined you to others whom he has labored to save. To Jesus, these others are as precious as you are. For, they have been purchased by his innocent blood. And that innocent blood is given to each of us to strengthen and keep us in the body together. The cup which our Lord gives to us now is the cup of blessing, given for our good. By it, Jesus builds us up—in faith to him and in love for one another. For, it is by this grace that we are motivated to love each other, as St. Paul says, “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)
We build each other up, by grace. For we are members of one another. (Ephesians 4:25) If part of your body was in pain, you would not want to dismember that part of your body. You would want to seek relief for the pain so that your body would be sound again. In the same way, you should not be willing to cut off those whom God has joined to you. If one has sinned against you, love will seek his good. You may put the best construction on his words and actions. For, you don't know if his thoughts are consumed with an ailing brother or with a lost job. If someone sins against you, they need your prayers more than your anger. On the other hand, love may require you to correct him. It is not loving to say, “Well, my neighbor has stolen from me. I suppose he needs it more than I do, so I will not bother him about this.” It is not love to let someone become hardened in his sin. Love demands that we seek each other's good. And that includes upholding God's word to him. It is not love to let your fellow member violate the Commandments and to stand by as if it does not matter. Love will seek to reconcile your neighbor to God and then to each other. The body of Christ is not built up by ignoring each other's sins, but by the Lord absolving us of what is wicked and directing us to what is good. The body is built up by the mercies and grace of Christ alone.
We build each other up, by grace. We uphold Jesus Christ to each other as the one who has saved us from our sin and from every emotion that comes from our sins. We uphold Christ by acting toward another as little christs. We seek each other's good with our words and actions. We put away falsehood for truth. We put off anger for compassion. We forsake revenge for reconciliation. And we empty ourselves for the building up of each other. In this way, you become imitators of God, as beloved children. (Ephesians 5:2) In this way, you honor your God, even as you reflect his love for one another.
In the name of the Father and of the Son + and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
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